Real Life. Real Strategies. Real Quick.
Smart Solutions for Working Women.
June 2, 2010
Issue #10

Reduce Your Guilt with 3 Simple Questions

As working women, we often believe that constantly feeling guilty is the price we pay for juggling so many roles and responsibilities.  While it may be difficult to completely eliminate the guilt we feel, there is no reason we should feel consumed by what we perceive as our shortcomings.  The next time you're feeling guilty, answer these three questions and you'll likely find yourself feeling a whole lot better.

  1. What EXACTLY am I feeling guilty about?
    Taking time for yourself?  Working instead of staying home with the kids?  Not working longer hours?  Hiring help?  Not feeling "present" at home?  Asking friends for help?  Before you can solve any problem, you need to make sure you're perfectly clear on what the issues are in the first place.

  2. Do I have any control over the issue that's making me feel guilty?
    If you have no control over the matter, then you're only making things worse for yourself by not letting it go.  What's the point of feeling guilty about working long hours if that's what you need to do to pay the mortgage?  Is there any value in feeling guilty about leaving work early when you're the primary caregiver for your sick parent?  If you're having trouble moving on from the guilt, consider what you might tell a friend in the same situation.  Chances are, your advice to them would be a lot kinder than the criticism you're piling on yourself.

  3. What CAN I do about this situation?
    Regardless of whether you have any control over the problem, you can usually find strategies which help you manage it better and feel less guilty.  Make a list of all the approaches that might work, and give one a try.  Maybe you can send more frequent emails to your mom who says you don't call enough?  Perhaps you can discuss with colleagues how you'll actively contribute to the team project while working a part-time schedule?  Sometimes it's the simplest solutions which have the biggest payoff.

Faun Zarge helps people find solutions for their work-life challenges.
She offers her practical, realistic strategies through a wide variety of highly interactive and engaging seminars.  Please feel free to contact Faun directly to discuss how she might help your organization.


Faun Zarge Logo

Forward to a Friend